Howdy folks! How are we all doing?

A head cold hit me hard in the middle of last week and it really knocked me off my pace for the best part of a week. Writing fell off the cliff as after work and bits and pieces at home I didn’t have the energy to write. I did get a few bits and pieces written down, but I wasn’t working like I had been during January. In fact, when I look at this month as a whole I haven’t been anywhere near that level of productivity. I knew I hit the ground running in January, and this month I feel like I’ve fallen back into how I have been before.

I’m at about twelve hours for the month, so a little under an hour per day. I do need to remind myself that I can’t expect to be hitting thirty plus hours a month, each month. Last month was an abnormality and although I’d like to be doing that each month I know I’m not there yet. I need to stick to my aim of twenty hours a month, and if after say three consecutive months of hitting the minimum of those twenty hours, then maybe I lift my target.

That all said, I feel like I’ve got back on track a little. Yesterday I worked for two hours after a call and I worked my way through 8527 words editing, adding 640 to my overall word count on Penal Earth 2. Today I wrote 345 words on my mars based story doing that in about twenty minutes during my break. Then when I got home I did half an hour on Penal Earth 2, editing 1015 words and adding 343 to the overall word count.

I’m not discounting a dip in my mental health over this time period. Although I feel like my mental health has been on an upward trajectory in general and this has been the first dip I’ve had in say the last three months. This is the longest I’ve been on a positive rise for quite some time and I’m really happy with this. I can’t tell you the last time I’ve felt this settled. It’s felt good and although I’m worried I’m going to fall back into a downward spiral I feel like that’s not going to happen as easily as it has done in the past. It’s hard to describe but I feel like I have a new resolve, a new determination. Like all the work I’ve done, the help and guidance I’ve been given, the medication, is all coming together and I can work my way through what is put in front of me.

That’s not saying I’m not having tougher moments. I have still felt anxious a lot, still not sure what or where I want to be. It’s a weird feeling, it’s like I can’t settle anywhere. It’s weird to describe and I’m still working my way through it and figuring out the what and the why of it all.

Anyway. It’s well past my bedtime. I’ve got a mid-shift tomorrow so I don’t have to be up as early, but I’m planning on leaving earlier than I need to as I got stuck in traffic the other day when I had a mid.

I hope everyone is having a good week. I’m gonna finish watching this movie, ‘What happened to Monday?’ and then get my head down.

Have an awesome one, folks!